2-YEAR-OLDS, WHERE IDEAS COME FROM, RANDOM SULTRY WISDOM & A COUPLE RECIPES

I stepped hesitantly onto the scale this morning, wary after raiding the fridge at 2 am. and again at 4. I was in search of basted quail but settled on pig. I rang in at 201 lbs.; up two pounds from yesterday. My weight fluctuates like the mood of a two-year-old after chocolate. The mountain air is dry, the deer are restless, everything is still, the branches, the grass, still and nostalgic like an '80's polaroid. The weather girl says no less than 50 degrees for the next 10 days. "And hopefully humid," I shout at the television screen, my first words of the morning. I step outside to recycle a can and I'm nearly knocked from my feet by an arctic blast. The warm front had not yet arrived I guessed. The cold air makes me feel barbaric. I headed over to the local market, disheveled and demanded the most non-lean, sodium rich bacon in slices thick like the tongue of an elk. I cooked it crispy with onions and paprika. I drained the stodgy pieces on paper towel and then, in a linear fashion, placed them on top of over-easy eggs sprinkled with parsley and ground black pepper. On the side, home fries, Russet potatoes cubed and sauteed in olive oil, red onions, habanero, black pepper and a little sea salt. The act of cooking well is a fundamental necessity in life for happiness and in my case temperance. My wife, two-year-old and I have long and animated converstaions about food and its artistic properties, which lead us into discussions about wall art, Mickey Mouse, toe jam, and properly sculpted play dough. The terrible twos they call it. I can't disagree. But in a way she resembles not a bi-pedal homosapien, or even a neandertal, but instead the Napoleanic birds on the feeders tearing each others' feathers out for seed, or the mad, somewhat rabid giraffes on Animal Planet banging skulls over territory and sex. Of course I say it all in good humor, my "chewy" is the M&M in my bowl of peanuts and raisins, she's sprightly and vastly intelligent for being 20 inches high. In a wily moment of infant genius, the other night, the tot handed me her empty glass of milk and vociferously stated, "more wine!"

CHAPTER 5: WHERE THE IDEA TO WRITE THIS WORK ON HABANERO CAME FROM

I don't believe I have mentioned yet where the idea to do this research came to me. I needed to write something. The creative juices were flowing and once this happens it becomes a sort of obsession.  I began writing about something or other, then put it aside and started on a different idea, trashed it, started another one, trashed that one, and this went on for five or six attempts over the course of about two weeks and about 250 wasted pages before I began the habanero research.  I don't continue writing something unless the work begins to write itself, and sometimes I am a quarter or half way finished with a project before I realize that it just isn't working and I scrap it.

            My epiphany occurred on the first day of a statistics class.  "Statistics, why do we need it?" The professor asked.  The silence that followed that question was deafening.  But I knew what answer was pictured in every student's head in the class.  It was the first day of what I suspect might be the start of a fifteen day journey through unadulterated hell.  I enrolled in a summer business statistics course, 3.0 credit hours on my way toward graduation in May of 2011.  I am an accounting major.  Symmetry, balance, thinking on a rational plane is what I am being trained to do.

            If you are not familiar with the discipline of statistics, it is nothing less than, in my opinion, unmitigated muss! A mixture of dissimilar ingredients: words, numbers, and sounds, data, symbols and random shapes plugged into what appear to be either formulas or medical mysteries, producing endless strings of decimal points, parameters, guesses, etc. which lead not to an answer but what may be or may not be right but also could be close or might be close later.  I survived Problem/Stats, the first level of statistics, did O.K. but not without losing a piece of my God given sanity, not without questioning the purpose of life and the reasons behind obscure things like fluid friction's effects on fluid motion and logograms and syllabic glyphs.  The thought of the habanero pepper had not yet crossed my mind.

            Statistics, why do we need it?  In business as in anything people have to make decisions.  We have to make decisions even though uncertainty exists.  Will we always make the right decision?  Of course not. Do we also say no to wine on a school night? Never! And because we don't always make the right decision, proves that statistics has an advantage to practical life and business situations as well.  The advantage of statistics is that it enables us to make a decision even though we don't have 100% of the information.  How about the decision of whether or not to mince habanero peppers and then rub your eyes?

            We were to focus on two branches of statistics:

1) Descriptive Statistics- Describing a collection of data quantitatively. What does it look like, what is the middle point, how much valuation?

2) Inferential Statistics- I'm going to tell you what something is by using other sets of information.  For example I infer about a population by using a sample from that population.  The population is the larger group of interest.  The sample is only part of the population.  It is a subset of the population.  But when using a sample you have to be careful.  You must use a Random Sample.  To be a random sample the probability of selecting that sample should be equal to selecting any other sample within the population.  There are two necessary assumptions in order to do inference; one of those assumptions is that you need a random sample.  If I take a sample that is not random, I can't tell you anything relevant about the population.  Another assumption, that is accurate 90% of the time is you have to have a Normal Distribution.

            How are we going to do this?  There are tools that we will use to assist us through the formulas to reach the necessary information.  They may also be referred to as symbols representing something.

            x - is called x-bar.  That is the sample mean.

            s - is the sample standard deviation.

            m - is called mue - is the population mean - (the average that corresponds to the whole population).

            p - is an estimate

            ii - is called pie and is the proportion of the population.

            o - sigma - the population standard deviation.

            The parameter is the characteristic of the population (pie, mue, sigma)

            How do we decide about the population parameter?  There are two ways a question is asked which identifies which method you use to solve the problem.

            Question 1: What do you think the population parameter is? (A question with the population parameter unknown, you will have to estimate the value of pie, mue or sigma).

            Question 2: This is the population parameter. (Statement)  What do you think?

            If it is Question 1, and an estimate is needed we use a Confidence Interval. If it is Question 2, a statement, we use a Hypothesis Test.  The key thing to look for is what is the question.  That will determine what is used.

            Say I tell you that mue equals 8.  You have to take a sample of the population because it is too expensive and time consuming to draw a conclusion using the everyone in the population.  You take a sample.  What is your best guess that mue equals 8.  For this you would use x-bar.  mue equals 10 and x-bar equals ? (a number).  x-bar doesn't have to equal 8 because it is smaller than the population, remember, it is only a sample of the population.  Say mue equals 8 and x-bar equals 8.  You will then have a pretty good chance that mue actually does equal 8.  If mue equals 8 and x-bar equals 7.7, you are not sure mue equals 8 but it most likely is equal to 8.  If there is a small difference between what mue equals and what x-bar equals you are likely to believe that mue equals, in this example 8.  If mue equals 8 and x-bar equals 50, most likely mue doesn't equal 8.  x-bar equals 50 is not representative of the the population.

            Here is a wonderful question and answer that pretty much sums up statistics.

Question:  "How much difference does it have to be, to be small or large?"

Answer:     "It depends."

            It is at this point my mind began to drift and the image of a habanero popped into my brain.  I started pondering whether or not it would be possible to genetically mix a habanero and jalapeno pepper, creating a jalabanero pepper?  Then I started to wonder if I would be able to write a book focusing on habanero peppers but also talking about life all across the spectrum without losing the reader along a wild river of stream of consciousness.

            The rain was pouring down outside and strangely enough the time was flying by.  When the professor awarded us a 10-minute break I have to say my hand was cramped, my brain was next to fried and my back was having mild spasms.  Should I remind you that this was day one.  At first I suspected caffeine withdrawal, then cursed myself for staying up until 2 am the night before reading about Minoan Civilizations by Stylianos Alexiou.  Sooner or later one must except the fact that one is taking on four months worth of statistics in three weeks and one just has to grit and bear it.  It is an ominous reality.  Once I regained control I realized that there was still an hour and a half to go and we weren't even through Confidence Intervals with sigma given.  I exited the classroom to use the Lue.  Standing in front of the urinal I could think of nothing but habanero peppers.  Upon reaching the sink to wash away any germs that were sent airborne on water particles during the flush, I noticed the sink water stank so bad like sulphur I soon forgot about the peppers and instead tried to justify the use of sulphur in university sink water.  I returned to my seat and spoke briefly with another classmate about the World Cup.  Before long the professor returned to the front of the classroom, my friend Lincoln returned from filling his water bottle, other students returned from smoking cigarettes, retrieving snacks from a nearby vending machine, or fooling around in the student parking lot and it was time to continue Confidence Intervals with sigma given.  It was at that point I decided that I would write an essay on habanero peppers and life in general in the formula similar to Athenaeus’ Deipnosophists from the 3^rd century A.D., in my opinion one of the greatest books ever written.  I only tell you this because I know out there in this big, brutal world there are inquisitive people, like myself, who like to learn about how and when writers first decided when they were going to write whatever it is they decided to write.  What was the ambition, the show on television, article in the newspaper, everyday madness, or moment in a statistics class that inspired the research and work?  Sitting in a statistics class high in the mountains is one way to find inspiration, worked for me.

            For me, writing is a very enjoyable hobby but I also am very regimented in how I go about it.  The preparation, research note taking etc., though, is done often at any time and anywhere an idea comes to mind.  I am always scribbling down notes and ideas.   I keep pens and scraps of paper in my pockets and book bag, and I used to keep them in my briefcase while working at the bank as well.  When it is time to begin the work I will wake between 5:30 and 6:00 in the morning, brew a pot of coffee, sit in the same spot everyday and drink it black while I write. I can work all day long until it is time to pick up the little one. Writing is a much more difficult task then people realize.  Once you get into it you find that you are soon sleep deprived, practically malnourished because you spend all your time concentrating on your work and forget to eat, the laundry piles up, the lawn becomes a jungle, the house slowly begins to fall to rack and ruin and it takes so much out of you to keep everything balanced. That was a joke. So all in all that is where the idea for the paper came from.

CHAPTER 6: A COUPLE RECIPES

The recording of recipes and their use has been around since the 1600 B.C. and was discovered on an Akkadian tablet from southern Babylonia.  Ancient Greek recipes have survived the ages and they had cookbooks.  There are also ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics about food preparation.  Roman recipes are known, the most well known is Cato the Elder’s De Agri Cultura (Manual of Farming), an essay of Cato’s knowledge and experiences including a section that consists of recipes for farm products like Coan wine, which is wine from the Greek Island of Kos.  It is made with sea salt which gives it its distinctive saltiness.  According to Pliny it was created accidentally when a slave added sea water to the must trying to meet production quota.  What he invented became a popular drink with a solid reputation in Classical Greece says Greek Historian, Strabo (63 BC – ca. AD 24).  It was held in the same regard as the popular wines Lesbian and Chian.  Cato also mentions a recipe for Vinum Graecum, which is an imitation of sweet Greek wines exported to Italy during the Roman Empire’s rule.  Cato the Elder was a Roman statesman, soldier and author.  He was born in 234 BC and died 85 years later.  He is the one who made the famous quote, “This corn is well grown and Carthage must be destroyed.”

            A large collection of recipes called “Apicius,” from between the 4^th and 5^th century, according to Samuel Pegge possibly authored by Calius, written in Vulgar Latin, is the only surviving cookbook from the classical world that is complete.  The name Apicius corresponds to a “love of food” after a Roman gourmet and indulger of luxuries, Marcus Gavius Apicius, who lived around the 1^st century AD.  The text is arranged into ten books.

1) Epimeles – The Chef

2) Aeropetes – Fowl

3) Cepuros – From the garden

4) Pandecter – Various dishes

5) Ospreos – Peas, beans, lentils, chickpeas, etc.

6) Sarcoptes – Meats

7) Polyteles – Gourmet dishes

8) Tetrapus – Quadrupeds

9) Thalassa – Seafood

10) Halieus – Fish

            Interestingly at the time in Italy, tomatoes and pasta had not yet been introduced to the region, which create recipes for Italian cooking so well known today.  Antiquary, Samuel Pegge (1704-1796) who, in 1791, the year of Mozart’s death, published an edition of the Forme of Cury (a compilation of old English cookery that we will talk about next) said, “As to the Romans; they would of course borrow much of their culinary arts from the Greeks…”

            In 1390 King Richard the II of England commissioned a book of recipes titled “Forme of Cury.  A Roll of Ancient English Cookery.”  It is a collection of approximately 205 recipes (depending on version) authored by the Master-Cooks of King Richard II.  The name, Forme of Cury, was penned by, above mentioned, Samuel Pegge.  Here is an example of one of the recipes, written in Middle English originally on vellum.  I selected an oyster recipe since oysters are my favorite food.

XIV. FOR TO MAKE OYSTRYN IN BRUET

They schul be schallyd [1] and ysod in clene water grynd peper safroun bred and ale and temper it with Broth do the Oystryn ther’ynne and boyle it and salt it and serve it forth.

[1] Have shells taken off

           

            Just so you know, I don't add to much: salt, sugar or butter AND NO lard to my cooking and you would never know (except maybe for salt) when eating one of the dishes without being privy to the ingredients.

PAELLA WITH HABANERO

3 cups of rice

5-6 cloves of garlic minced

1 orange habanero pepper minced

5 tbls. olive oil

7 cups of water

2 bouillon cubes

1 tbls. oregano

1 small yellow onion

2 tsp. black pepper

2 tbls. of parsley

1 tsp. taragon

1 tsp. sweet paprika

fresh rosemary (for garnish)

1/2 cup of peas

1 generous pinch of saffron

1/2 red bell pepper chopped

1 green bell pepper chopped

1 lb. chicken 1-2 inch chunks (optional, can also use duck, fish, rabbit, etc)

10-15 clams (optional, can also use mussels)

1/2 lb. shrimp (optional)

1/2 lb. scallops (optional)

5 oz. tomato sauce

  In a large skillet, saute the onions, garlic, parsley and oregano in olive oil until the onions are transparent.  Add the chicken, red and green bell peppers, habanero, black pepper, sweet paprika, taragon and saute until the chicken becomes white.  Add the tomato sauce and three cups of uncooked rice and cook for 3-4 minutes.  This will give each grain of rice a nice flavoring.

            Pour the contents of the skillet into a large pot.  Add the 7 cups of water and two bouillon cubes.  Add the peas.  Turn the burner onto high until the water begins to boil, cover and lower the flame so you have a simmer.  Cook for 15-18 minutes.  Stir in the shrimp and scallops and place the clam on the top.  If the rice appears to be getting dry add more water.  Cover the pot and continue cooking for another 3-6 minutes.  When the clam shells open they are cooked.  If any of the clam shells do not open discard them.  DO NOT PRY OPEN AND EAT!!  Turn off the flame and let sit for five minutes.  Serve and enjoy.

            The practice of eating rice mixed with vegetables and fish, chicken, fowl, etc. came from the Moors around the 15th century.  The paella that people are most familiar with today originated in Valencia, Spain in the 18th century.  It was on special occasions that paelleras would cook rice in their orchards near lake Albufera.  Marsh rat was one of the early ingredients for the dish, along with eel, land snail, and butter beans.  The eating of marsh rat was mentioned by novelist Vincente Blasco Ibanez in Canas y Barro.  Depending on country or personal preference ingredients vary from dish to dish.  Often the paella is prepared from whatever vegetables and meat is around combined with rice and spices.

MANGO COD WITH HABANERO

4 fillets of tilapia

1/4 - 1/2 cup of blended mango (about 2 - 4 mangos)

1/2 orange, red, white or pink habanero pepper minced

3 cloves of garlic minced

olive oil

1 red onion cut into strips

fresh parsley (for garnish)

lime juice

            Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

            Blend at least 1/2 cup of fresh mango (about four mangos).  Smear each fillet with the blended mango and drizzle with olive oil.  Sprinkle the minced garlic on each fillet.  Wearing latex glove, sprinkle minced habanero onto each fillet (Be careful not to add too much.  EXTREMELY HOT!!) Place 3-4 strips of red onion onto each fillet.  Three drops of lime juice evenly on each fillet (one drop on the left end, one in the middle and one on the right).  You don't want to taste the lime juice but rather for the fillet to have a hint of lime.  Place into the oven uncovered and cook for 20-25 minutes or until cooked all the way through.  Remove from oven, garnish each fillet with fresh parsely, serve and enjoy.
Tilapia is a fresh water fish usually found in lakes and rivers.