THE BIG DIVORCE

By Greg Evans

It must be the "in" thing to do because everybody is doing it. Jump on the band wagon, be cool, get single and hit those music festivals and be hip. And what's worse, parents who want to party and be accepted by the single promiscuous pot heads. The parent who wants to be far out and goes off the deep end and abandons the majority of their domestic responsibility. They spend all their free time on social media sights and traveling to music festivals, night clubs, bars, dinner with the "friends."A large portion of today's youth marry simply to be able to divorce so they can have the coveted "ex."

Nowadays anyone who is anyone has an "ex." It goes like this, "Hey man are you cool?"
"Yeah man, I'm cool,"
"No I mean, are you cool?"
"I'm cool, I'm righteous, I've got soul."
"I could tell you had an ex."
"I got my ex six months ago, snap, bang, I'm a lady ready to be crazy,"
"Right on, welcome to the beginning, party righteous, club iguana tonight, party every night of the weeks, ex's only."

There you go. That is the basic gist of it. To be cool you need to be a divorcee. Marriage takes work and in this hippy colony we call society it takes too much energy to have a marriage and a normal family life. Washing dishes, mowing the lawn, doing laundry, reading to the kids, playing with the kids, saying grace before dinner, eating dinner together at the table, going to the playground, etc. it's all too boring, too mundane, too unhip for the hipsters.

Divorce has been around forever but these days it is becoming as ordinary as ordering super sized french fries and double cheeseburger to help feed the other vices you may have along with night clubbing and promiscuous sex with whoever agrees that capitalism is a fungus. And surprisingly it is women who are initiating the majority of the divorces. Though both men and women can't handle the monogamy of marriage, the domesticity, the wonderful joys of playing quietly with the kids and enjoying the hard work of having a family. In Ancient Athens you had to submit a request to a magistrate who would then decide if your reasons were sufficient to be granted divorce. That right there would void nearly 97% of the divorces since 2000 - 2013.

Anyone who has ever been approached by their spouse who says, "I'm not happy because I'm not having enough fun," knows that any form of debate would probably be pointless because already their rationalization for breaking up a marriage and family to have fun is already having bizarre personal issues that would probably have landed the person in the hen house before 1998. In half the cafes and 3/4 of the bars in the country you can hear the nonsense of unhappy spouses telling some garbage about wanting to get out there and have fun, it's all about living to have fun and what fun is a marriage and kids anyway? If anyone thinks I'm the one who is crazy feel free to respond. But there is nothing that anyone could ever say to me that would make me change my mind.